Global Domination

Elks: Destined for the sun

07/10/11  ||  sly

First of all, let us distinguish today’s Elks from the other handful of unimaginative fucking bands who have named themselves after a massive member of the deer family.

Brace yourself.

There exists “Elk” from the UK, “Elk” from Canada, “Elk” from Cork, “Elk” from Oakland, “The Elks” from Orlando, “The Elks”: a ’70s band from Perth, “The Elks Band” from Toronto, “eLKs” from Seattle, “Elks” from London, and, finally, today’s group of morons is “Elks” from Brooklyn. I won’t even get into all the bands with the word elk in their title, e.g., Elk City, Absent Elk, Black Elk, Elk Semen… Okay, so the last one I made up, but I think I’ve made my point.

These dudes have a moniker as unoriginal as their music. Think Baroness, Kylesa, Mastodon, Saviours, and maybe even Black Tusk. It seems like Brooklyn’s Elks have chosen to forgo an identity, steal a bunch of riffs, and jump on the bandwagon of posers with tattoos, gauged ears, and a mix of ’80s thrash metal and shirtsanddestroy.com t-shirts. And don’t forget the MySpace pictures of the band boozin’ it up. ‘Cause we’re totally old enough, man.

If you are a die-hard lover of this type of stuff, you might really dig it. And luckily for you, in an age where people mostly listen to music off their computers instead of supporting bands, you can hear the entire album online. Elks may be mere imitators, but at least they’re awfully generous.

4/10: Destined for the bin.

After going thru that crap, you most likely wanna read something way more interesting. You do, admit it.

Below are some links to most recent articles, take your pick.